I’m not following you, I was going in this direction anymotherfucking way.

Currently my Twitter bio. Said by a homeless woman with a gift for language who hangs out on my street.

Don’t punch girls and I don’t punch a clock

I’m not really cool enough to use hip-hop lyrics as mottos, but it’s true that I don’t punch a clock. Or, as I put it to my neighbor this afternoon, “I have an expensive twenty-hour-a-week not-working habit.”

Pecan, mince, humble

This one is courtesy of my friend J., responding thus to my offer to eat humble pie: “I prefer pecan. I know not everyone likes the savory pies, i.e. pecan, mince, humble, but I’m sticking to my guns.”